5 things I do to make sure I'm ok first

because if I'm not ok neither is anyone else

1. Move my body first thing

Because if it doesn’t happen first thing, it ain't happening. My preferred methods are a pool swim, in which I alternate between front crawl and breast stroke because I'm building my stamina and lung capacity. But also because one end of the pool has a huge picture window that overlooks the most beautiful green woodland and I can't see it if I've got my head underwater!

When I can't get to the pool I do pilates in the kitchen as the kids eat their breakfast. It invariably requires me to pause multiple times to fill up cereal bowls and ends with a small child clinging to me demanding a cuddle. But I get it done because it helps clear my head.

2. Eat a nutritious breakfast

No more polishing off the kids crusts as I scrabble around getting them ready for school. I make a point of making myself a healthy colourful breakfast that is a feast for the eyes as well as my stomach. And then I sit and eat it, savouring every last mouthful. This week has been scrambled egg on toast with sun-dried tomatoes, pea shoots and a few grinds of black pepper. I'm also trying 200ml of kefir everyday because its supposed to be amazing at helping ADHD brains focus.

3. Get my thoughts out of my head and on to the page

This is a new one for me. I've tried doing morning pages so many times over the years, but after a few days the words don’t seem to want to flow anymore. I find having specific journal prompts helps. I have some from The Head Plan that get me unearthing some real treasure from my subconscious and examining my conditioning so that I can start to take small rebellious steps towards unpicking it and rewriting the narrative of what it means to be a woman and mother in 2024.

4. At least 5 minutes in my garden 3 times a week

I mean of course my garden features in this list. I'd love to say I get out there every day. But in reality, I aim for that and some days I just don’t manage it. Work gets in the way, or a small child is monopolising my attention. Instead of beating myself up about not managing it like I used to do I reset and try again the next day.

I do however have a minimum standard. Even on my most vibrant weeks, when by Friday I feel like someone switched me off at the mains, I make sure I get out for 5 minutes 3 times across the week. It re-energises me, quiets my mind and allows me to recalibrate ready for the weekend. So that I’m ready to engage more fully with my family and actually enjoy their company, rather than being a tightly coiled spring ready to break after one too many snack requests.

5. Get 8 hours sleep a night

When I was in my burn out episode, and for many years prior to that, I would wake in the night dripping in sweat, my mind racing as I lay awake for hours staring at the ceiling, willing myself to go back to sleep, tears running down my face.

But since I found gardening my disturbed nights are much less frequent and invariably down to one of my offspring instead of my overwhelmed mind keeping me awake.

Without a doubt steps 1-4 help with this. But when I was at rock bottom, barely able to function it was spending time tending to my garden that started to quiet my mind and allow me to get the sleep I needed.

Which of these will you try?

Let me know in the comments.

p.s. If it’s number 4 and you’d like some inspiration for 5 minute mindful gardening activities to get you feeling good then upgrade to paid by clicking the pink button below and come and join our gardening gang!